Not self-explanatory, is it?
Good thing I am here!
To get this story, you have to get what I am talking about. If you are a Southern Baptist or live in Oklahoma, you probably know what Falls Creek is. If not, I'll explain:
Falls Creek is a summer camp located in Davis, Oklahoma. It is a small camp where thousands of kids go each summer to praise the Lord for everything he does, to ask for the forgiveness of their sins, to have a good time, and.. well.. to be honest, to find someone of the opposite gender to be their icee date for the night. (This also needs to be explained.) An icee date is when you take a person to the icee stand after evening tabernacle, you walk around the camp and then go back to your cabin for late night devotions. Icee Dates have been around since my mom went to camp in Middle School, and more so beyond that.
Now that you have the "where" of my story, I can move on to the who.
Like I said again, stud muffin?
Well, at Falls Creek, in the afternoon I was walking by the icee stands looking for my younger sister who was also at Falls Creek that week. We were going to grab an icee, and after 10 minutes of hot, hot searching I decided that I should head back to the cabin. ( Ya know, to avoid intense sweating and stinky smells). I am walking back and a man stops me, Stud Muffin. He says, "Ma'am, I think you are one of the most beautiful people I have ever seen." Me and my sly words reply with, "Well, I like your shirt."
This is the shirt, so who wouldn't say that?
(Granted, less muscles were underneath the shirt I was viewing...)
This statement is followed by a quizzical look and a "Thank you. Would you like to get an icee?"
I replied with a "Sure, I have nothing better to do."
Now reader, before you think I am crazy rude, realize that I am MONDO awkward around men. Awfully, awfully awkward. So me saying this is a cover for me to not say something more embarassing. Plus, Stud Muffin took it with a grain of salt so it was all right.
We get icee's and sit to talk for a while. When I say talk, I mean I use my great listening skills to hear everything I would ever need to know about this guy. As our time draws to a close, I say "Well, I should really be heading back. I need to get ready for tabernacle. So, we head back to my cabin. As I say my thanks for the icee and my good-bye he asks if we can go out later that night to grab an icee. "I am not so sure, I think I have some small group things I need to take care of." Nice reply for me? YES!
Then, he brings in a new challenge... "Well, I would hate to never see you again."
Crap. Don't you get it? No, thank you!
"Well, we will work on that." This would be my happy response and I turn to walk inside. Poor Stud Muffin walks away semi-upset but I figured he could find a new lady... wanting to wait on his every word.
I go inside, take a shower, get ready for service and come downstairs to find 10 Middle School Boys awaiting my presence. Like guard dogs, they all run at me yelling, "Date John Michael, Date John Michael!"
"Who?" Is my response to that, like I said, really smooth.
"Ya know, Stud Muffin!"
"Oh Gosh. Wait, what? Why should I date him"?
"Well, Kiyana he explained the Holy Trinity and the Speed of Sound to us!"
Holy Trinity! "Well," I simply suggest, "Why dont you date him?"
My second puzzled look of the day and then one sticks his head out and asks if I would go out with Stud Muffin again, I said no and walked off.
Fast forward, later that night, I am in service and one of my girls in my small group gets incredibly sick so we get up to leave. We then go back to the cabin to wait for the clinic to open back up after service. When it does, we call a golf cart load her on it and I get on the back to see none other than Stud Muffin looking at me sitting at our cabin. Now, my time for the puzzled look. I send a brief wave and try to forget about the whole incident. We get to the clinic, get my girl checked out, and get on our walk back to the cabin. By this time, it is 10:30, and everyone must be in-cabin by 10:00. As soon as I walk into our cabin, I hear news that I had a visitor waiting for me... all night. That visitor? You guessed it, Stud Muffin!
Apparently, he waited from the end of tabernacle (8:35) to in-cabin time (10:00) Wow. When another adult leader went outside to talk to him, his response was, "I know I only have a 1 in 62 chance in seeing her, but I will sit on the off-chance of her return."
Oh Boy....
Hate to say it, and not to be rude, but glad I missed him.
I come home the next day to find a Facebook friend request. Can you say, no thanks. Not now, not ever on Facebook?
No, you can't I checked.
Hopefully, this has entertained you and brightened your day!
Sincerely,
AWKWARD.
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